so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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