From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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