it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize