bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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