I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
