So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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