Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
i think i just lost a toe
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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