Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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