I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
