Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize