Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
