Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
