Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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