Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Randomize
