i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
