Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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