He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
