Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
