We're facebook friends in real life
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
It's Friday. Sex?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
