My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
