so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
