Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
