Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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