Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
