We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
