im gay
i know
yea but for you.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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