i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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