Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
