Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
