Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize