mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
we're making bets on your personal life
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
