I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize
