Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
two words...techno handjob
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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