am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize
