Sry I called you an 8
Jerry, you need to find god
he was CRYING into my vagina
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
