it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I understand Curling. That high.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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