just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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