She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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