She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
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