i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
