I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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