Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
