Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
