He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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