I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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