When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
