Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize