I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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