i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
