my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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