marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
So vagazzling was a success
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize